Sexual Abuse

Since you were little, you were told how to protect yourself when crossing the street or what to do if a stranger tried to get you into his/her car. But what do you do when it's your own relative, friend, or date who is making you feel uncomfortable by touching you in a sexual way?

Do you know that one out of three girls is sexually abused by someone in her family? For boys, the figure is one out of six. And these are just the reported cases. So many kids are afraid to tell.

What is sexual abuse?
You may not be sure what kind of affection is normal within a family. Hugging, kissing, patting each other on the back, and even playful wrestling or tickling are all normal.

But if someone, touches your private parts, insists that you touch theirs, or French kisses you, against your will, that is sexual abuse.

Some abuse doesn't involve touching. Pornography or taking pictures of undressing or nakedness is still sexual abuse.

What do you do?
The first step is to break the silence. Tell someone.

Who do you tell?
Tell an adult you can trust. And if the first person you tell doesn't believe you or doesn't do anything to help, find someone else to tell.

Some examples are: a parent, teacher, school counselor, pastor, or youth leader.

If you're in immediate danger...
Go to a friend's house
Invite friends over
Make a phone call to a caring adult

You are in charge of you

You are the only one in the world who has the right to say who will touch your body. By saying or yelling "No" to an abuser, you're letting him/her know that your body is not up for grabs.

If you're alone in a room with someone who makes you feel uneasy, leave the room immediately. Maybe they haven't actually done anything yet. Maybe they're just sitting or standing too close, or looking at you in a wrong way, or trying to block you, get you in a corner, or acting and speaking as if they know you more than they really do. Leave the room. Don't worry about manners or appearing rude. It's much better to be impolite than to be abused!

Good news
Be clear on this. If you (boy or girl) have been raped, molested, or abused, according to the full, complete definition of virginity, you're still a virgin. Your virginity is something you give away, not something that can be taken from you. So if it was taken, consider yourself still a virgin and protect who you are.

Don't wait
Muskegon County Protective Services receives approximately 3,000 child abuse complaints every year. Probably twice as many go unreported. This means that most people don't report abuse until they are an adult, or not at all.